TODAY IS CAUSE FOR CELEBRATION

Today, 10 years ago, my life came to a complete stop and, in the days that followed, it would be flipped upside down. We left Vanceburg, KY, bound for Ashland, KY. I hadn’t been feeling well for a few days so while we were in Vanceburg, I went to the hospital in Maysville, KY. The doctor in Maysville did a cursory exam and told me that I had a kidney infection. He prescribed some antibiotics and sent me packing. Well by the end of the drive to Ashland, I was doubling over in pain. My mother rushed me to the emergency room at Kings Daughter Memorial Hospital and after listening to me describe my symptoms, the Doctor did a full medical workup. When the results for the blood-work came back, the doctor thought I had appendicitis so he sent me for a cat scan to confirm his diagnosis. Little did we both know what lay in store. The results showed a large mass in my abdomen. I was admitted and scheduled for surgery two days later on Monday.

After I woke up, the doctor told me he removed one of my ovaries that had a ten pound tumor attached. He thought the tumor was benign since it was so large and I really hadn’t been experiencing ill health until that week. He said the pathology would be back at the end of the week to determine if it was cancer or not. That Friday, I received the news everyone dreads: the tumor was indeed malignant… I had CANCER.  I was scheduled to follow up with a GYN Oncologist two weeks later. I was told before he discharged me that he didn’t think it was an aggressive type of cancer. I suppose he said that to calm my fears. After all, I had just turned 30 and I wasn’t ready to face my own mortality. I left the hospital and went home with my sister-in-law to recuperate. After staying with her for about a week, I insisted that I was well enough to go back to work. She of course knew better but I was adamant. I know now I was trying to run from my diagnosis. I thought that by going back to work, my life would return to normal and I wouldn’t have to confront my demons.

After a week back with the Circus, I made a return trip to Ashland to see the GYN Oncologist and discover what kind of cancer I actually had. What he told me just devastated me more. The pathology showed an extremely aggressive cancer called Mixed Mullerian Tumor, or Carcinosarcoma. He was shocked to see it in someone my age. It’s a cancer that affects post-menopausal women. He told me my traveling days were done and I needed to seek immediate medical attention to get the full scope on how far my cancer had spread. We decided to look for an oncologist around the area my sister-in-law & brother lived. An appointment was set up and a week later I was boarding a flight in Washington, DC to take me away from the job I loved. The night before I left, the entire show turned out for my farewell party. I cried later that night, not knowing if I would ever see them again. I landed and the next day, I met with my second oncologist. After meeting with that oncologist, I was scheduled for another surgery. So for the second time in less than two months, I was admitted to the hospital. I was given a radical hysterectomy, along with an omentectomy. The omentum is a layer of tissue that hangs down from the stomach and a place cancer cells love to inhabit.

After that surgery, I decided to find out all I could about the type of cancer I had. Every article I found on the internet didn’t offer much hope for a long life. Most patients diagnosed with this type of cancer died within two years. There were a few patients that lived 3-4 years with it, but almost all died before 5 years passed. Naturally, I freaked out!! Here I was, 30 years old, thinking I was going to die before I turned 35. The doctor tried to assure me that every patient was different and nothing was set in stone. I wanted so desperately to believe him but gloom settled over me like a black cloud. I became so depressed that I lost myself in that gloom. I eventually let go of that black cloud and decided that if I was to die young, I wouldn’t want to spend my final days wrapped in misery.

I went through two years of checkups every three months to make sure the cancer hadn’t returned. After the two years, they made the checkups every six months. Still, the cancer didn’t come back. Now 10 years later, I am still CANCER FREE!!  I am so glad that I learned to let go and live life to the fullest.

For anyone newly diagnosed with cancer, remember that it is a fight that can be won, even if the odds seemed stacked against you. Don’t let gloom and despair be your companions; instead let the love of God shine through to light your darkest hour. I know it was through His love that I was given a new chance at life.

To close, I’m posting a favorite video of mine by Tim McGraw. The title: LIVE LIKE YOU WERE DYING.  I know I have ever since I was given this new lease on life.

Until later, God Bless...